Divorce Lawyer Coquitlam | Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators Port Coquitlam Wed, 22 Aug 2018 20:09:43 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.3.3 What To Do When It’s Obvious You Need A Divorce https://www.laughlinlaw.ca/obvious-need-divorce/ Wed, 22 Aug 2018 20:09:43 +0000 https://www.laughlinlaw.ca/?p=3053 Divorce in each of the 50 states follows a different set of criteria. The process of obtaining a divorce is determined by the state the couple lives in, not the province the couple married. The latest laws of divorce give the spouse the right to serve the soon-to-be-divorced spouse papers through Facebook. So, if after […]

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Divorce in each of the 50 states follows a different set of criteria. The process of obtaining a divorce is determined by the state the couple lives in, not the province the couple married. The latest laws of divorce give the spouse the right to serve the soon-to-be-divorced spouse papers through Facebook. So, if after attempting to serve your spouse with divorce papers face-to-face, you have failed you can lower your expectations and serve them via the internet.

The saddest types of divorce cases involve the dissolution of a marriage with young children. Custody and child support are usually a source of contention between two parties in any court case. The average divorce case rarely disappoints in this area. The elements of most divorces include either an at-fault divorce or a no-fault-based divorce. In addition to the necessary criteria to file for divorce the former couple will also have to resolve the following issues:

  1. Spousal Support
  2. Child Support
  3. Child Custody
  4. Distribution of Property
  5. Division of Debt

The residential requirement only applied to the spouse applying for the divorce, not the remaining spouse.

An at-fault divorce was once the only way to obtain a divorce. Now, people have had to find ways to contest an at-fault divorce, and some have sunk into utilizing sinister means to fight these divorces. They have used collusion, deceit with another party to challenge the process; condonation, agreeing to the activity to lure the party into a comfort level about the act; connivance, participating in the act they are now complaining about; recrimination, accusing the accusing party of the same act; and provocation, when the spouse uses provocative events to initiate enough emotion so that the one party acts. In all of these cases, one party is seeking to stay married to the party applying for the at-fault divorce.

In the case of a no-fault divorce, neither party has to be found guilty of any wrongdoing before a divorce is granted. Still, a no-fault divorce needs a reason for the dissolution. That reason can range from an irremediable breakdown, like when one party moves out and refuses to move back in or from incompatibility or from irreconcilable differences, which takes forms like differences that include character, beliefs, incurable insanity and personality.

Now, with the advent of community property, another wrinkle has been added to the divorce debacle. In a divorce, the division of assets is an integral part of the process. In community property states, the assets are divided according to when the spouse acquired the assets. If the assets were acquired before marriage, the spouse alone has a right to those assets. If those assets were acquired after marriage, the assets would be divided between both spouses equally.

With all these variations to divorce, there is one devastation that remains the same, no matter what type of dissolution the spouses participate in and that is the damage to the children. Children are always the biggest victim of divorce. They have very little say in what is done or how their parents handle the situation, but they are always victimized by the actions of their parents.

It’s only when the exes choose to display their disappointment with each other that children begin to feel unwanted feelings about the situation and themselves. As hard as it is to explain the decision to divorce to children, it should be explained in understandable language for a child. Most importantly, it needs to be honest, the real reasons you can no longer live together as husband and wife.

For instance, in the case of infidelity, the children should be told the truth. Daddy fell out of love with Mommy or vice versa, but daddy will never fall out of love with you, his baby. That’s a different kind of love that never fades or dies because he created you.

In the case of the inability, for husband and wife to get along, the parents can explain that mommy and daddy don’t know how to get along any more. Be calm when you explain this and hold the child while you say these things. Tell them that you did one thing right together, you made the children whom you both love with all your heart. And lastly explain how you are now trying to learn how to share their new lives with the children, and it may take a while to get all the new scheduling and timing perfect.

The things you as a parent don’t want to do is accuse the other parent of wrongdoing in the presence of your child. You never want to give your children the impression that there is any character in the other parent which makes him or her unsuitable. If you must complain, you should do so in private away from the children. Set up an appointment with your ex and meet away from the children and air out your differences there, and only in such settings.

If the spouses decide to have equal custody of the children and each partner behaves justly, fulfilling his or her responsibilities to the children, then the children usually adjust to their new situation reasonably well. It’s only when bickering, and constant arguing is part of the dissolution that children seem to be the most injured parties.

In all types of divorces, if children are involved to best practices of the parents is reflected in a fair sharing of the children. Each parent should give some time to the rearing and interaction with each child. Both girls and boys need the interaction with their moms and dads. It teaches them how to have healthy interactions between parent and child and men and women.

Divorces may not realize this, but when they can healthily resolve their disagreements, their children learn how to resolve their differences with others in a non-violent, peaceful fashion. It’s not only a teaching moment; it sets them up for a future of peace, free of discord. We all have moments when we disagree with others, how we resolve these issues determines how we navigate the constant influx of problems we face daily. Navigating a divorce well, whether it is ugly or non-contentious sets us up for the future. Divorces should strive to start their new single existence without any burdens holding them down, and that should include feelings of hate and distrust for an ex-spouse. Children know when those feelings exist. The only way to hide them is not to have them. There is a tendency to think psychological help for children will resolve their problems, but it’s the parents who should seek psychological help resolving their anger toward each other so that the whole family can be healed after the breakup.

Coquitlam Divorce Lawyers

Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators
2755 Lougheed Hwy #710, Port Coquitlam, BC V3B 5Y9
(604) 945-4370

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The why’s of divorce mediation in British Columbia https://www.laughlinlaw.ca/blog/2017/08/the-whys-of-divorce-mediation-in-british-columbia.shtml Mon, 07 Aug 2017 22:10:58 +0000 https://laughlinlaw.ca/?p=364 On behalf of Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators posted in Divorce Mediation on Monday, August 7, 2017. There are few things more heated in a family dynamic as discussing an impending divorce. British Columbia couples who are separating — especially when there are children involved — might do well to seriously consider divorce mediation. Solving […]

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There are few things more heated in a family dynamic as discussing an impending divorce. British Columbia couples who are separating — especially when there are children involved — might do well to seriously consider divorce mediation. Solving issues peaceably is emotionally healthier for everyone involved.

Mediation may be less expensive and less stressful than going to court. The divorce mediation process will help both individuals learn how to best resolve contentious issues in positive, constructive ways. Mediation is also an informal, private process, which is conducive to constructive problem-solving. A licensed mediator will work with each party to iron out issues while still considering the needs of both people.

Essentially, there are three types of mediation: civil lawsuit, family and child protection. Once the couple agrees on issues, the mediator will help them put pen to paper regarding their agreements. Any agreements made under these umbrellas are legally binding and are viable alternatives to going to court. Mediation addresses all kinds of disputes.

Mediation not only helps to find solutions to issues not initially agreed upon, but it empowers each individual with negotiation skills. It may also give each party the skills to be able to maturely discuss issues in the future regarding any children they have. Once soon-to-be-former couple understands the legalities surrounding these issues, they will be more apt to make joint decisions rather than having their fate decided by a judge.

Even though divorce mediation in British Columbia avoids the litigation process, individuals have the right to get a divorce lawyer experienced in family law to give them valuable advice and guidance throughout the mediation process. A lawyer will make sure any settlement agreement complies with British Columbia’s family laws. He or she will present any accepted agreement to the court to be approved.

Coquitlam Divorce Lawyer

Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators
2755 Lougheed Hwy #710, Port Coquitlam, BC V3B 5Y9
(604) 945-4370

Source: mediatebc.com, “Mediate BC Why Choose Mediation?“, Accessed on Aug. 4, 2017

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Can I pay child support direct to my children? https://www.laughlinlaw.ca/blog/2016/06/can-i-pay-child-support-direct-to-my-children.shtml Wed, 29 Jun 2016 21:10:41 +0000 https://laughlinlaw.ca/?p=321 On behalf of Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators posted in Child Support on Wednesday, June 29, 2016. It’s a question many noncustodial parents have. They balk at having to give their exes money every month and wonder if it’s being spent on the children’s needs. However, in the vast majority of situations, the answer is […]

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It’s a question many noncustodial parents have. They balk at having to give their exes money every month and wonder if it’s being spent on the children’s needs. However, in the vast majority of situations, the answer is no. You cannot pay child support directly to your child, and here’s why.

The first issue is that most parents only have to pay child support until the child is an adult or has graduated from high school. A parent paying child support directly to a minor child is likely to end up with the money being spent on wants and wishes instead of going to the paying parent’s share of the financial costs of raising the child.

However, even in cases where a support order is still in place after the child has reached 18 — which sometimes happens if the paying parent is significantly in arrears — payments cannot be made directly to the child without the other parent’s consent. This is because the courts do not believe that the paying parent should necessarily get to control how the payments are made or how the money is spent.

There is also a concern that allowing this would make it easier for some parents to use the money as a way to exert undue control and influence over the child. Even if the other parent does agree, the courts may still question whether the child has the experience and maturity to handle the money appropriately or whether the money would have negative consequences on things like financial aid for college.

Source: FindLaw, “Can child support go directly to the kids?” Steve Morales, accessed June 29, 2016

Coquitlam Divorce Lawyer

Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators
2755 Lougheed Hwy #710, Port Coquitlam, BC V3B 5Y9
(604) 945-4370
https://www.laughlinlaw.ca

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Court orders in child custody cases can help https://www.laughlinlaw.ca/blog/2016/06/court-orders-in-child-custody-cases-can-help.shtml Fri, 24 Jun 2016 18:23:08 +0000 https://laughlinlaw.ca/?p=524 On behalf of Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators posted in Child Custody on Friday, June 24, 2016. Child custody matters, which are now known as parenting time and parenting responsibilities, are important matters when parents aren’t in a relationship but still have the child to take care of. In most cases, it is necessary to seek out assistance from […]

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Child custody matters, which are now known as parenting time and parenting responsibilities, are important matters when parents aren’t in a relationship but still have the child to take care of. In most cases, it is necessary to seek out assistance from the court to keep things working smoothly with the child.

We understand how difficult it is to have to turn to the court for help deciding what is right for your child. There isn’t any reason to dread the process, but it is important that you understand the process and your rights. We can help you with both of those so that you are better prepared for what will happen.

When you think about child custody matters, you have to think about what is best for your child. This isn’t something that should be used to prove a point to your ex or to try to get back at your ex. Instead, you have to put your feelings regarding your ex to the side and focus on what your child needs.

In most cases, it is best for your child to have both parents in his or her life. When we can, we will help you to work out a parenting arrangement that allows this to happen, as long as there aren’t any circumstances that would make a parent unfit. You can let us know what points you feel you are willing to negotiate on.

As your child grows, it might be necessary to revisit the points in the agreement. We can help you with working out modifications to the agreement as things need to be changed.

Coquitlam Divorce Lawyers

Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators
2755 Lougheed Hwy #710, Port Coquitlam, BC V3B 5Y9
(604) 945-4370
www.laughlinlaw.ca

The post Court orders in child custody cases can help appeared first on Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators Port Coquitlam.

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The real estate market’s impact on divorce settlements https://www.laughlinlaw.ca/blog/2016/03/the-real-estate-markets-impact-on-divorce-settlements.shtml Wed, 30 Mar 2016 18:39:22 +0000 https://laughlinlaw.ca/?p=557 On behalf of Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators posted in Division of Property on Wednesday, March 30, 2016. Because the family home is often the most valuable asset a divorcing couple has, it’s common for there to be disagreements over who should get to stay in the house. While the booming housing market and increasing property values may sound […]

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Because the family home is often the most valuable asset a divorcing couple has, it’s common for there to be disagreements over who should get to stay in the house. While the booming housing market and increasing property values may sound like a good thing to most, it can mean added stress and more difficult in property division for those divorcing.

Canada recognizes that both parties have an equal right to the marital home, and this is true even if the house is only in one person’s name. However, this can be problematic if the house is of significant value. There are a few different options when it comes to deciding what happens to the family home. The first is that the couple agrees that one party is to keep the house and the other party gets other assets to ensure an equitable division. The second is that the couple must split the value of the house.

This second option means that either one party must buy out the other or the property must be sold, and the profit split between both parties. The problem with the increasing house values is that it’s becoming more and more common that one party can simply not afford to buy out the other, meaning the house must be sold. The market is changing rapidly as well, which means that a house may increase in value substantially from the time of the divorce filing to the settlement, particularly if the settlement process takes several months.

If you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse own a home, it’s important to discuss the implications and options with your lawyer as soon as possible. In some cases, you may need to have more than one done or speed up the settlement process.

Source: Global News, “How Metro Vancouver’s hot real estate market can affect divorce settlements,” Jon Azpiri, March 15, 2016

Coquitlam Divorce Lawyer

Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators
2755 Lougheed Hwy #710, Port Coquitlam, BC V3B 5Y9
(604) 945-4370
www.laughlinlaw.ca

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How is child custody determined in British Columbia? https://www.laughlinlaw.ca/blog/2016/03/how-is-child-custody-determined-in-british-columbia.shtml Fri, 18 Mar 2016 18:40:53 +0000 https://laughlinlaw.ca/?p=563 On behalf of Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators posted in Child Custody on Friday, March 18, 2016. One of the most important things that happen during a divorce between people who have children is the child custody order. Child custody is one issue that can cause great strife between parents. Learning about some basic points of child custody can […]

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One of the most important things that happen during a divorce between people who have children is the child custody order. Child custody is one issue that can cause great strife between parents. Learning about some basic points of child custody can help you to know what to expect. It can also help you to make decisions during the child custody determination process.

What is the difference between access and custody?

Access is granted to the parent who doesn’t have custody of the children. Custody is either sole, joint or split. This term means who the child will live with. If a parent has sole custody, that parent’s home is where the child lives most of the time. The other parent would usually have access to the child, which means the right to visit the child and ask about the child.

How is child custody determined?

When parents can agree about what will happen with the children, they can often come up with a parenting plan on their own. In this case, the agreement would be what governs the child custody issues. If the parents are unable to come to an agreement about the child, the court will have to step in to decide on a custody order. The court will consider all factors presented to it before deciding what is in the child’s best interests.

If you are in the midst of a child custody battle, you should understand your rights. You should also work to understand how the law pertains to your case. All of this is crucial so that you can make decisions whenever necessary.

Source: FindLaw Canada, “How is child custody determined?,” accessed March 18, 2016

Coquitlam BC Divorce Lawyer

Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators
2755 Lougheed Hwy #710, Port Coquitlam, BC V3B 5Y9
(604) 945-4370

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Court harassment: What you need to know https://www.laughlinlaw.ca/blog/2015/11/court-harassment-what-you-need-to-know.shtml Fri, 13 Nov 2015 18:56:28 +0000 https://laughlinlaw.ca/?p=606 On behalf of Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators posted in Child Custody on Friday, November 13, 2015. Many divorces, separations or even just custody disputes between never-married couples can get very heated, causing the parties to act in ways they maybe wouldn’t normally. It often doesn’t take very long for one party to start trying to use the family […]

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Many divorces, separations or even just custody disputes between never-married couples can get very heated, causing the parties to act in ways they maybe wouldn’t normally. It often doesn’t take very long for one party to start trying to use the family courts as a way to punish the other party. When this happens, it may escalate to the level of court harassment.

In simple terms, court harassment is when one party abuses the legal system in an attempt to cause the other party undue emotional stress, damage the other party’s reputation in the community or cause the other party damage financially. Any of these things can and do happen to some degree in most divorce and custody cases, but when it reaches the level of abuse to one party, it moves into harassment territory.

One example of court harassment is using the victim’s fear of having to involve the courts to threaten them into doing what the abuser wants. In this situation, the courts become an intimidation tactic. Someone engaging in court harassment may also file false reports, bring trivial issues to the court, use the other party’s health issues to embarrass him or her in court or ask for repeated continuances in an attempt to cause the victim ongoing financial and emotional stress.

If this sounds like an issue you are currently dealing with or have had to deal with in the past, it’s important to discuss your situations with a lawyer. Once someone has started to engage in court harassment, it is often an ongoing cycle. Talking with a lawyer can help you be better informed on your options for stopping court harassment.

Source: Family Law in British Columbia, “What if your ex is harassing you through the courts?,” accessed Nov. 13, 2015

Coquitlam Divorce Lawyer

Laughlin & Company Lawyers Mediators
2755 Lougheed Hwy #710, Port Coquitlam, BC V3B 5Y9
(604) 945-4370
www.laughlinlaw.ca

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